still waters runs deep

still waters runs deep they say. But in my personal view and nowadays my personal problem is that I just lost my voice and I have to regain it, I have to stand up and say. I have to defend myself and to defend my standpoint of view.
I am so enormously ANGRY at myself. But anger will not help me tomorrow and the day after. For as mentioned in Matthew 10:16 I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.
And sometimes I just doubt myself and my capability so much that I remain silent. But I am not stupid and my standpoint of view is reasonable if it concerns my opinion.
Stand up girl, I say to myself right now, stand up and speak! do something! for gods sake, if you do not you just loose your own faith and capability, that is all what you do with remaining speechless.

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